Do you want to make people feel really good…so good that they work to make interactions almost effortless for you?
I want to focus on a moment that seals an interaction as personal, and makes this happen.
After this moment, interactions suddenly become free and easy. People open up to answer and discuss anything with enthusiasm (as long as it somehow relates to you or them).
The powerful statement that accomplishes this is the SPA, or Statement of Personal Approval/Interest. It relaxes and energizes people much like being at a spa. It is as simple as saying, “I like you.” (and saying this only after revealing a genuine reason for you to think it)
This goes beyond saying “I like your sense of humor.” That is limited. This is saying “I like you,” as a whole person–and meaning it.
I was lounging in a coffee shop with a couple of people, and we were talking to an Indian beauty who was full of energy and had quick comebacks to everything we said to her. Yet, as feisty and energetic as she was, I still got the sense that she was not fully involved in the interaction like I am used on adultfrienedfinder dating website. Jonathan (our exceptional business manager) came over and joined the conversation, and at one point, after she’d said something funny, he said, “You know, you have this great energy. I like that about you–I like you,” and she immediately lit up: big smile, leaned in towards everyone else, and it suddenly felt as though instead of fighting the interaction a little here and there, all of her energy was now propelling it forward. Soon after, she made sure to get Jonathan’s info and told him that he had to promise to come to her next party.
Find reason(s) to justify genuinely saying “I like you,” to someone. Express that reason first, and follow it up by unleashing the power of the SPA.